I£¬You and she « Result #1 on Mar 13, 2009, 12:29am »
Peter was a clever boy. On his first day at school, he learned three words: 1, You and She. The teacher taught him how to make sentences with those words. The teacher said," I, I am your teacher; (then pointing to a girl) She, She is your classmate; You, You are my student.
¡¡¡¡When Peter went home, his father asked him what he had learned at school. Peter said at once, " I, I am your teacher; (then pointing to his mother) She, She is your classmate; You, You are my student His father got angry and said, "I, I am your father; (then pointing to his wife) She, She is your mother; You, You are my son.
¡¡¡¡The next morning at school, the teacher asked Peter if he had learned the three words by heart. "Yes," he said proudly, "I, I am your father; (then pointing to a girl) She, She is your mother; You, You are my son."
Hypnotist Error « Result #2 on Mar 13, 2009, 12:29am »
It was opening night at the Orpheum and the Amazing Eileen was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do her stuff.
As the Amazing Eileen took to the stage, she announced, "Unlike most stage hypnotists who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience."
The excitement was almost electric as the Amazing Eileen withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from her coat.
"I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. Its been in my family for six generations."
She began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch.... "
The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface.
Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.
Cheating Wife « Result #4 on Mar 13, 2009, 12:29am »
Sam and Becky are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. Sam says to Becky, "Becky, I was wondering - have you ever cheated on me?"
Becky replies, "Oh Sam, why would you ask such a question now? You don't want to ask that question..."
"Yes, Becky, I really want to know. Please..."
"Well, all right. Yes, 3 times..."
"Three? Well, when were they?" he asked.
"Well, Sam, remember when you were 35 years old and you really wanted to start the business on your own and no bank would give you a loan? Remember, then one day the bank president himself came over the house and signed the loan papers, no questions asked?"
"Oh, Becky, you did that for me! I respect you even more than ever, to do such a thing for me. So, when was number 2?"
"Well, Sam, remember when you had that last heart attack and you were needing that very tricky operation, and no surgeon would touch you? Then remember how the doctor came all the way up here, to do the surgery himself, and then you were in good shape again?"
"I can't believe it! Becky, you should do such a thingfor me, to save my l ife. I couldn't have a more wonderful wife. To do such a thing, you must really love me darling. I couldn't be more moved. So, all right then, when was number 3?"
"Well, Sam, remember a few years ago, when you really wanted to be president of the golf club and you were 17 votes short..?" wow Power Leveling wow Power Leveling
Violin Lessons « Result #5 on Mar 13, 2009, 12:29am »
"Daddy, can I learn to play the violin?" young Sarah asked her father. She was always asking for things and her father was not very pleased.
¡¡¡¡"You cost me a lot of money, Sarah," he said. "First you wanted to learn horse riding, then dancing, then swimming. Now it's the violin.
¡¡¡¡"I'll play every day ,Daddy." Sarah said. "I'll try very hard.
¡¡¡¡"All right," her father said. "This is what I'll do. I'll pay for you to have lessons for six weeks. At the end of six weeks you must play something for me. If you play well, you can have more lessons. If you play badly, I will stop the lessons."
¡¡¡¡"0. K. Daddy," Sarah said. "That is fair.
¡¡¡¡He soon found a good violin teacher and Sarah began her lessons. The teacher was very expensive, but her father kept his promise.
¡¡¡¡The six weeks passed quickly. The time came for Sarah to play for her father.
¡¡¡¡She went to the living room and said, "I'm ready to play for you, Daddy.
¡¡¡¡"Fine, Sarah," her father said. "Begin.
¡¡¡¡She began to play. She played very badly. She made a terrible noise.
¡¡¡¡Her father had one of his friends with him, and the friend put his hands over his ears.
¡¡¡¡When Sarah finished, her father said, "Well done, Sarah. You can have more lessons."
¡¡¡¡Sarah ran happily out of the room. Her father's friend turned to him. "You've spent a lot of money, but she still plays very badly. he said.
¡¡¡¡"Well, that's true," her father said. "But since she started learning the violin I've been able to buy five apartments in this build very cheaply. In another six weeks I'll own the whole building!"
The Good Side of Fear « Result #6 on Feb 25, 2009, 1:58am »
I had the chance to sit down at Jack Murphy Stadium in San Diego with Joe Montana before he went onto the field with the San Francisco 49ers against Denver in Super Bowl XXIV (1989).wow power leveling, We didn't know it then, but this would be Joe's last Super Bowl, his fourth championship, yet another high point in one of the most remarkable careers not just in pro football, but in all of sports. Joe seemed restless. wow power leveling,He had already won everything there is in this game - the respect of teammates and opponents, coaches and owners, and especially the fans - plus all the awards: multiple League Most Valuable Player (MVPs), Super Bowls, wow power leveling,and Super Bowl MVPs.
I said, "Joe, you can't possibly be scared."
What he said to me is, wow gold,I believe the key to his success and the reason I consider him the greatest quarterback of all time. He said, "If you're not afraid of losing, then losing means nothing."
Every time Joe Montana stepped on the field, he was scared. wow gold,That element of fear kept him sharp through his entire career. If we want to be at our best, we need that same element of fear burning inside of us. It sharpens the focus; keeps the edge.
There isn't a day that goes by that I don't remember what Joe said, wow gold,realizing the truth of it. It has helped me. I know it will surely help you.
Having a ready-formed plan « Result #7 on Feb 25, 2009, 1:58am »
there was once an artist whose name was Wen Tong. He was famous for his bamboo drawings.wow power leveling, A lot of people asked him for one of his bamboo drawings.
People wondered why Wen Tong could draw so well. Actually, Wen Tong loved bamboo so much he had grown various bamboo around his house. No matter what season it was and no matter whether it was sunny or rainy,wow power leveling, he used to go to the bamboo forest to observe how they were growing.
He carefully observed the length and breadth of the bamboo poles as well as the shapes and colors of the leaves. Whenever he found something new, he went back to his study and drew what was in his mind on paper. wow power leveling,After a long time, the images of the bamboo in different seasons, under different weather conditions and at different moments were deeply imprinted in his mind. Whenever he stood before the paper and picked up a painting brush,wow gold, various forms of bamboo came into his mind at once. So, every time he was drawing bamboo he appeared confident and at ease. All the bamboo he drew looked like real.
When people spoke highly of his paintings,wow gold,he always said modestly that he had just put the images of the bamboo imprinted in his mind in the paper.
the phrase "having the images of bamboo ready in one's bosom" means having plans or designs ready in one's mind before doing a certain job so that its success is guaranteed. wow gold,It also means being calm and sober-minded in dealing with things.
This story took place several years ago,wow power leveling, when our boys were about eight years old. It was the first game of the season, and the first game in which the boys began pitching. I went out to discuss ground rules with the umpire and realized that is was also the first year that the boys could steal bases. Unfortunately, we had not gone over this in practice. wow power leveling,So I hurried back to the dugout, gathered my players and proceeded to go over the rules.wow power leveling, As I got to the subject of stealing bases, I announced enthusiastically, "And this year we get to steal!" The news caused the boys to erupt into yelling and cheering. wow gold,Their response left me thinking positively that this might all work out okay after all. wow gold,Then the cheers died down, and as our team was about to take the field, one player loudly exclaimed,wow gold,"Steal what?!" I let out a groan as I realized that the question had come from my son!
There was peace once, though by now it is but a distant memory in the minds of those old enough to remember. There was order and cohesion, and nothing to fear. The Keepers of Hesperides stayed within their walled Haven, and none disrupted their peace. There was always a rumor that an object of unspeakable power lay hidden within those great walls, but in time the rumor grew dull with age. But now a young stallion, maddened with greed, is gathering all the information he can about this mysterious object of celestial power. Flanked by the powerful drafts of the northern lands, he is murdering and taking prisoners left and right. There is only a handful of southern herds that stand against him, led by the mysterious Theseus. If they are vanquished, the Keepers will be on their own. Chaos and uncertainty abound. How much longer can the forces of reason hold off this madman?
The board is set, the pieces are in play. Whose side will you join?
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